Till Death Do Us Part
by Fur and Fantasy
full contents and notes located at the bottom of the file
The Kat I love is dead.
It's a terribly simple statement, really. One we all knew would come true sooner than later. He had luck, but with the chances he took it was inevitable. I've had a long time to prepare for this day.
But it doesn't make it any easier to stand here and watch his partner, my husband, grieve in a way I know he won't grieve my passing. That's assuming he's still around for it. As much as I hate it, I can't deny the possibility that he'll go kamikaze to end his pain.
He's never been any good at dealing with pain. Not the mental kind anyway.
Now that there's no going back, did I really choose correctly?
My love asked me to be silent years ago, just in case his heart's desire didn't want him. He couldn't risk their partnership and all it meant to the world for a personal dream.
My husband never spoke of it, but it was obvious to anyone who slept with him. When the nightmares came he accepted my comfort, but it was his true love's -- his partner's name he called for before he woke. It was his partner's name that escaped his throat during his more intense pleasure.
There was no point to denying it.
Six days ago I called him on it. I came out and asked if he loved his partner. He told me more than I ever wanted to know in five seconds of pure honesty.
"I love him more than you, baby. I just can't have him." His voice burned into my memory.
He bolted as I stood there, frozen by the understanding of the lie we all lived. None of us had our first choice, and we all could have.
He wanted his partner. His partner wanted him. I wanted them both, but his partner first and most.
I hate life sometimes.
I should have followed him, forced him to listen to what I knew. Forced him to his partner's apartment and locked the door. Then told them both what they'd each told me and left them to each other's attentions.
I just couldn't.
Not knowing all these years I could have had what I wanted most. I could have had both of them, and maybe even more importantly, they could have had each other.
How was I to know that he'd be in a car crash that night? That a drunk driver could do what all our enemies and problems couldn't. He was a hero. He is a hero. Even in death he's making a difference. I've never seen a law passed so fast.
I never summoned the courage to tell him that his partner loved him after that.
I focus back on the muddied winter wonderland of the graveyard. My husband is kneeling next to the fresh grave. He's shivering, and it's not from the cold. The snow in front of him is melted.
I've lost them both.
Okay, girl. Let him go with some grace. With what dignity he has left. It's the least you can do after your mistakes.
"I'll wait in the car." I inform him quietly, grateful that my voice is calmer than my heart.
He gives no response to my hand on his shoulder, or its leaving as I retrace my steps to the parking lot. I don't expect one. He's beyond me.
It would have been easier to have never let them in my heart, but it's a choice I can't turn away from. I gave my word to protect this world. I will keep it as best I can. They've both done enough.
At least I never loved him like his partner did. Either of them. I couldn't deal with someone who held that much control over me.
The winter winds bite and howl at my coat, kicking up powdery snow in my face as I struggle with the car keys. My numbed ears still pick up the muffled single gunshot I knew was coming.
Till Death Do Us Part
Het Level is High Slash Level is Femslash Level is None Herm Level is None
4 KB, Story is Complete, Series is Finished
Written December 4, 1998 by Rauhnee Ranshanka
Setting: SWAT Kats
Primary Races: Kat
Contents: Furry. Het (M/F). Slash (M/M). Angst, Death, Suicide
Pairings: Chance Furlong/f (either Callie or Felina), Chance Furlong/Jake Clawson
Blurb: One accidental death shatters the hopes of three.
Disclaimer: All things taken directly from the sources listed under 'Fandoms' belong to the owners of those shows. No harm is intended and we're definitely not making any money. Now, the things we created are ours, and if you see 'Non-FanFic' up there, it's probably all ours.
Page Hit Count from July 18, 2007